Hello Sweet Friends,
If you are a mom like me with young adults in their 20s, you might have heard your children say, “Mom, it seems everyone is getting engaged, married, or having babies.” Even though I married young and love being married, I fully encourage women not to rush into a relationship and use their early twenties to get to know themselves and to savor the world on their own. Don’t get me wrong; if you have the right partner, you can grow together, which is beautiful.
Even though we know there are a lot of benefits to being single, society still seems to pressure women to settle down. And unfortunately, sometimes we settle, even if we doubt it's the right person.
So much growth happens when we can spread our wings and be on our own. Having the time to focus on ourselves helps to build self-reliance. It gives us a better understanding of what we value and who we are, especially once we leave the safe nest of living with our parents and their parental influence. When we understand who we are and what we stand for, we are less likely to become followers and lose ourselves in any relationship. We have more respect for ourselves, and so will others. Knowing what we stand for is essential and will aid us in all aspects of work and life and lead to a more purposeful and fulfilling life. Having clear values and principles equips us better to notice red flags that might cause issues in a relationship.
The early twenties is a great time to grow and explore without feeling guilty. It’s important to understand what you need and what makes you happy. It’s also a great time to learn to do things independently to build trust in yourself, confidence, inner strength, and courage. Being independent helps us make decisions and take responsibility for our actions, choices, and goals.
So if you are single, enjoy this time of focusing on yourself and the freedom and learning that comes with it. When you are ready, and it's meant to be, the right person will cross your path. That person should not complete you but rather be a partner who will help you grow further into the unique and beautiful human being you are.
I will leave you with a beautiful quote by Gautama Buddha that sums up how I want to treat myself and want to be treated.
“When you like a flower, you just pluck it. But when you love a flower, you water it daily.”
So give yourself that nurturing self-love to grow daily, and when ready to settle down, don’t accept anything less than the same from someone else.
Much Love, Elisabetta