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  • Writer's pictureElisabetta Fernandez

Are you Thriving or Surviving?

If you are surviving, you accept the status quo and let life circumstances guide your life. You fall into the victim mode and blame other people for what is happening to you. By being reactive, you choose not to have control over your health and well-being. In the long run, this can lead to physical and mental disease and reduce longevity.

So how do you know you are in survival mode? If you don’t have an answer to the below, you are in survival mode.

  • Did you learn or try something new recently?

  • When was the last time you pushed yourself outside of your comfort zone or did something that was just a little scary? I’m not talking about dangerous things here :).

  • When was the last time you stepped up and said what you wanted without fear of being judged or wrong?

  • When was the last time you tried something, failed, but had the courage to try again?

On the other hand, if you are thriving, you are growing. You take steps to create the life you want and blossom into the woman you envision. You say I have control over my health, relationships, career, and how I show up in my life. You believe that life doesn’t happen to you. It happens for you. When something does not go as planned or shows up in your life unexpectedly, you look at the opportunity. You take the time to reflect and ask yourself why this happened, what part you have in it, and what you can learn from it.

If your heart is asking for change, listen. It’s telling you to move. Your heart is telling you it’s time, so stop listening to that voice in your brain that wants to keep you safe. You are ready to thrive. You might not know how, but you are ready, and that’s the first step.

So you realized that you want to thrive. Now what?

  1. Get to know yourself.

  2. Take time away from people and get quiet to reflect on what you want out of life.

  3. Go for walks in nature.

  4. Sit in meditation and ask yourself? “Who am I?” “What is my purpose?” “What do I want from myself and the world?”

  5. Listen to a guided meditation where you can meet your future self. There are many apps out there. I use Insight Timer.

  6. Take a personal values test at Personal Values Assessment. Living by our values makes us more fulfilled and aligned in life. Also, having the same values is vital in our relationships with our partner and friends.

  7. Understand your strengths. Take The VIA Character Strengths Survey. Ask your friends to tell you what strengths they see in you. You will be surprised by what they see that you do not. When we know our strengths, we are self-aware. We understand what makes us unique and how we can be of value. Feeling that we provide value is critical. We are more productive and engaged in work and life.

  8. Identify if there are some skills you have always wanted to learn.

  9. Who do you admire and look up to, and why?

  10. Read books that inspire you and ask others for recommendations.

  11. Listen to webinars and podcasts of people that inspire you.

  12. Take that class you always wanted to take.

  13. Get creative, have fun, and play just a little more.

  14. Most of all, have compassion for yourself. Change is not easy. Just remember that life is a journey, so take one step at a time and thrive.

If you have questions, I invite you to reach out for a complimentary coaching session.

Much Love, my sweet friend,


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